For myself?

Today was a bad day. Really it was. No maybe i should say, it started out as a good day, but it was spoilt, it ended off so bad.
Do you ever know how it feels when no one believe you? They doubt your words, your character, your actions. So afterall that i've done, this is what i deserve?
Thanks seriously.
Whats wrong with my life seriously. People have been coming in and out, and they done so much hurt to me, affecting me so much. Do you ever see the pain in me? No, because im too good at pretending right?
I tried to put up a strong front, coz i told myself you will get over this. Indeed, it got so much better. I've walked out of those shit, the shitty life, im feeling so much better, why must you push me back?
And those times when i hid in my blanket crying silently, when i walked home with my eyes red, who saw? Those times when i struggled to get my feets up, those times when i never want to gave up, who saw?
I dont know if there's anyone trying to understand me, believe me. But i just know, the feeling of being misunderstood, the feeling of people accusing you, it sucks.
Is it fair to me for others to judge me like this? They are not me, how would they know what i've been through, what i've done. Is it even fair to me?
I dont see a point explaining, if you are someone who trusts me, someone close to me, would i even need to explain myself? You wont even ask for my explanation right? On the other hand, if you dont even trust me right from the start, no matter how much i say, you arent gonna believe me at all.
Thanks so much, im not being sarcastic here, im really thanking you. You put me right infront of reality and im force to accept the facts, and thanks to all these, i've finally know what i should do.
I dont blame you, not at all, coz i know, you meant well.
And a word of advice, dont ever do something that you like. If you are, make sure you are doing it well. If you are not, change to do something which you can do well instead.

我现在知道了，我没有资格。
从今天开始，我不会再对不起自己了。
我应该为我自己多着想，其他的事，可能就没那么重要了。